There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize