normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
