I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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