why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
