Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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