thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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