as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
