I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
