last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
