yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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