either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
