I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
