I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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