Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
