Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I lost the right to judge tonight
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
