I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
