PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
