so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
