your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
