Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I just blew my weed a kiss
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
