Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
