What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize