You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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