elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
