My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
