And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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