Quick, to the slutcave!
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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