I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
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