Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
