Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I need to calm my uterus...
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
