I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
