I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
