Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
We left the knife in your bed.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
