But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
