Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
