well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Randomize
