Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
