I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
