I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
