Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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