Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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