Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just want to make out with him forever
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
