yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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