Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
