But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
