THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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