So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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