Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
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