PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize