i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
did i walk over a car last night?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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